You don't know a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes. That's the old saying and as far as I'm concerned one of the most profound inspirational quotes ever. Of course as a writer it means more to me than most other people. I spend a majority of my life in my own head, walking in other shoes, living other lives, imagining inspired worlds. But at the end of the day, I am not the warrior, or the poet; the lover, or the schemer, or even the mastermind. I can only ever be me.
There's another saying which is popular among writers, anyone who's taken a serious writing class will recognize it: Write what you know. And to me, that is one of the worst, most frustrating, embittering sayings ever. And unfortunately no less profound than the other.
They are both true, and in my opinion, set at juxtaposed positions. One of course urges the listener to explore or meditate. To empathize with those different from you by stepping outside yourself and imagine yourself under another person's stress. The other tells you to lean on your own experience, to write with confidence something that you're confidant about. Not to ponder, but to preach. To be the teacher of what you know, what you're good at.
I love the first for the same reason I dislike the second. Because my life is small.
That is not to say I dislike my life, but compared to all that my mind's eye is capable of, it falls short. I will never be the conquerer. I will never stand on the soil of another world. I will never fill my lungs with air that has never seen another human. What can my life compare with that? Until of course I remember that the ordinary makes the extraordinary possible.
I grasp for perspective because I can recognize that mine is so limited. We need both. A balance. That challenging of my own mind makes me a better person. I have faced hardship, but I have never known homelessness. I've lost family, though not tragically. My loss informs my compassion for other people. But because of that gap, I cannot help but struggle to understand. I'll never know the bite of bigotry or sexism, but my taste of ignorance has given me a hatred for it. I've never been betrayed by a friend, but seeing the wreckage afterwards of those who have, has cemented my commitment to be the best friend I can to those around me.
But how do I bridge the gap? Can I ever understand the difficulties that most minorities face daily? Life is inarticulable. A feature I'll probably write about later, but there is something too dissimilar in life, that there will always be a gap. I'll never stop trying to close it, but where do you draw the line? When do we give up trying to understand each other? As for me, it will be my dying breath.
Journal:
"There's us and there's them; there's the have's and the have not's. We're just fighting for a little closing of the gaps. Equal footing; that's it."
"But Joan, there are always going to be differences. Here, there, today, tomorrow and forever. Fighting isn't going to change the nature of the world. Its always been this way since the beginning of time!"
"But it doesn't have to be! Just because it hasn't, doesn't mean it won't. Ten thousand years it has been, and maybe another ten thousand years more, but maybe one day, ONE DAY, just maybe, people will learn to share freely, but only if we keep trying: Keep fighting! If we don't, you're right it will never happen. But as long as we keep trying, there's hope ONE day!"
"The nature of something MEANS it can't BE changed. People will always be like this. The difference is that you think a leopard can change its spots and I don't."
"No, the difference between us is that you can't imagine a world difference from this one. You can't imagine men and woman being equal or where race means nothing more than heritage, or where resources are given freely to anyone who is in need. You can't imagine a better world. Can't or won't."
"Oh, I can imagine it. But vision doesn't change natures."
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